Taking my time

It comes to the end of the weekend... and I'm still living in Weende. Haven't begun packing. And Monday I have a full schedule. Hmm...

In other news, I can get internet access in my dorm room set up on Tuesday night. I've already paid for it (not to mention the fact that I've paid rent for a room I'm not using for the past month.) It's a five minute walk from the lab and a five to ten minute bike ride to the center of town.

So why am I still here? Why am I dragging my heels? Is it the free breakfasts and dinners? Am I afraid of independence? (Is that such a bad thing?)

The last week has been decent, with only a couple of glitches. Such as: I still haven't managed to make it to a lecture... and I can't find my helmet... and my bike broke.

I'm not especially worried about the first on the list. I know I have a place in the Neuro class, and I'll assume for now that getting lost/going to the wrong place/finally going to the right place at the right time only to once again find an empty classroom... is simply a string of bad luck. So I missed some interesting topics (I actually was close to tears at missing the Neuroplasticity lecture) but since every block starts fresh I can't actually say I'm behind.

As for my bike helmet, I think I know where it is. I spent Friday morning trying to track it down after I left it in my writing class Thursday night as I rushed to meet with another Fulbrighter in Göttingen. It didn't help that when I finally got to the building in which my class is held, my old trouble came back... with every bike I've ever owned, it's the same thing: shifting gears is the bane of my existance. With my crap $50 Wal-Mart Special at Kenyon I blamed the technology, and learned to carry around a little tool to yank the chain back onto the gear every couple of miles... but with Flora? It must be me. The one advantage with Flora is that she rolls even with the chain stuck, rather than the back wheel sticking too, forcing me to physically carry my bike around until I fix it.

Anyway, back to the story. I decided to check out the classroom, which was of course locked. On Friday morning. I had no idea who to ask about getting in, so I decided to walk to the Lektorat and see if my writing teacher had rescued my helmet. On the way I saw my grammar teacher, so I stopped to ask if she'd heard anything. Nope. And she didn't think that the writing teacher was in that day... but she did know of a bike shop in the vicinity.

So, let's get things set to rights! Except that when I get there (only got a little lost on the way) they told me it would be €10, and they'd have to keep Flora until Monday night. I could come pick her up in the half hour between my German classes. Sigh. I decided to go for it, since I don't own any tools and the guy also said he'd fix it so the chain didn't over-shift anymore.

So I walked to the Lektorat, and bumped into my writing teacher. She hadn't seen a bike helmet, and the teachers had had a conference that night... the teacher from the class immediately after in that room hadn't mentioned anything about finding anything. But... the building had a guy who could let me in to check out the classroom. I should go talk to him.

I walked back to the first building and checked out the office. No helpful guy with keys, just a secretary lady who hadn't recieved any lost and found items.

Me, in German: Could I possibly see the classroom?
Secretary lady, auf Deutsch, natürlich: No, not today. But you have to come back Monday for class anyway, right?
Me, still in German: Oh, right. Okay.
Inside my head, in English: Argh! What is with these people and their obsessive objection to opening a locked door for a couple minutes?? Are they that busy? How the heck do you say "My bike broke down on the way here and it's a 45 minute walk home, so you'd better damn well take five minutes out of your day to find a way to unlock the frickin' door so this entire morning isn't a waste of my time, energy, and money!"
Me, in German: Thanks.

Nearly an hour later I get back to Weende and have tea with Christina and Oma. When I explain what happened to my bike, Christina was incredulous. She insisted that we go pick it up, called to tell the shop we were coming, and assembled a few tools with which to fix it when we got there.

The only problem was that the chain turned out to be really well stuck, so I ended up having to walk Flora back to Weende anyway... but I saved €10 and Christina told me about a better shop that does repairs on the fly, should I need their services in the future. Or of course I could always use her and Wolfgang's tools. I ended up feeling a little silly, but no harm done.

We also visited my future room to see what I need to buy. Curtains, for one thing, especially since it's on the ground floor. I also learned that the provided clip-on desk lamp is completely stupid and cannot physically be attached to the desk, and that the light over my sink is already burned out. And my room smells ever-so-faintly of smoke. And it's frickin' tiny... but that I already knew.

It's not a total hell-hole... but neither is is particularly nice.

Maybe that's why I haven't packed yet. It's actually homey here. And it doesn't smell like smoke.

Then there's the rest of the weekend. When I should have been putting everything in my suitcases, I instead had adventures with the Krebses. Saturday was crazy. There was a big NPD demonstration in Göttingen. The NPD is a rather-far-right-wing party, and, at least in this generally leftish academic town, not very well liked. Their platform is pro-German (and anti-outsider... so does that mean me?) and possibly has ties to the neo-Nazi movement. Supposedly they like to assemble here precisely because it's a leftish university town, and of course the students arranged a protest counter-demonstration. The police were out in force to keep the peace and preserve the NPD demonstraters' right to do their thing... and not just Göttingen police. There were vans and ambulances EVERYWHERE from all over the country, and huge numbers of cops in green uniforms barricading the streets where the march took place, apparently at a huge cost to the state. It seemed like half of downtown was blocked off. Christina and I biked down to check it out, and we saw one of the march protesters get arrested for being too rowdy about 20 feet away. We met up with Wolfgang and he said that the demonstraters had put together their own barricades and a big pile of trash at an intersection to the east of town, and then set it on fire. The whole street was black and the smell will probably be around for at least a week. The demonstration was supposed to last until 7pm, but the participants were asked to leave town a little early, what with the destruction of proprerty and all.

After the marchers went by, we found a way into the center of town and ate ice cream while listening to street musicians. Shops were doing business as usual, and you'd never know anything was going on just a few blocks north. Then we biked south of town to the garden. It's pretty common in Germany for a family to own a small fenced-in plot of land, especially if they live in a city. There is a small backyard at the house, but the garden has plenty of space for flowers and vegetables, plus a little furnished hut. Lots of families have gardens at the same place, and the couple across the way are friends of Wolfgang and Christina's, so we had cakes and coffee (and tea for me) together. Then we worked a little bit, mowing the grass, trimming a tree, and planting.

That night we had pizza and watched The Firm auf Deutsch, and the first half of an old Bond film, Moonraker, which was absolutely hilarious. Today I got an extra hour of sleep (yay!) and afterwards went to an art gallery opening with Wolfgang and Christina. There was interesting work from a couple of young Berlin artists, a mostly decent band, and a speech about the works that was pretty incomprehensible. I could plead language barrier twice in this case, since I haven't taken an art class since high school... but really, I wasn't paying attention. Other than a general interest in music and film/theater, I am unfortunately not much of an appreciator of the fine arts. Maybe it stems from a couple of bad experiences in art class... that time in a grade school summer program when my instructor poured orange and red and yellow paint all over my intentionally blue sculpture to "make it more interesting," or at MSA when the teacher asked me if the body of the ceramic frog I was sculpting was supposed to be a uterus, or maybe missing tech week rehearsals of Tom Jones at Rosati because I was put on academic probation after turning in my sketchbook a day late when said day just happened to be midquarters... at any rate, I don't particularly mind going to museums and gallery openings... and we'll just leave it at that.

Afterwards we biked to Weende-nord (even further away from Göttingen than the part of the village where we live) and had coffee (and tea) and cakes with another couple who are friends of the Krebs'. So... I haven't packed, I haven't done my German homework for tomorrow... but I'm happy, and I find that I like being dragged along to social occasions. I still think that I need to move soon, if only for access to Skype and my internet messaging programs.

But... maybe I'll wait until I'm good and ready.

In the right direction

I decided yesterday to punk out on my plan to take developmental bio auf Deutsch... and I couldn't be happier. For starters, I've been invited to sit in on the Neurosciences grad program lectures. What I didn't realize before was that this entails a block schedule in which each week covers a new topic... and the lecture times and places also change accordingly. I may have to miss a few or do some creative scheduling to have enough time in lab, but I think I can make it work.

The lectures are in English, and all of the topics are really cool! This week: Motor Systems and Neuroplasticity. (I think it's going to be kind of like intro Neuro at Kenyon, only WAY more intensive and detailed.) I don't get to sit in on seminars, methods courses, or tutorials, but that's fine by me since I'll get all that next year in grad school, and I'm learning plenty of new methods right now in lab. The only other drawback is that I missed the first two weeks plus this morning's class... but since the topics change I don't think it's really possible to fall behind.

In other news, my German ability is holding steady... yesterday morning I learned that I placed into Mittlestufe at the Lektorat. I can take up to three classes per semester, so last night I tried Wortschatzübungen I and Grammatik I. Both classes had about 40 people in the room! It's a far cry from the personal attention we got in Kiel. So I'll have three hours of class on Monday and Wednesday night... and tonight I'm trying Schreiben I, so that's an hour and a half on Tuesday and Thursday. I may end up dropping a course if it turns out to be too heavy of a load, but right now I'm really excited about it.

The way things are laid out right now, I think Mondays are going to be kind of crazy. Looking through the Neuro schedule, I almost always have a couple hours of lecture bright and early in the morning. Then lab in the afternoon and two German classes at night... and then choir rehearsal from 8:15 to 10!

But if yesterday was a long day even without morning classes, a musical nightcap was the saving grace. Once we started singing, I couldn't stop smiling. Even though I was totally exhausted, I felt a humongous surge of energy. We worked on Saint-Saëns' Oratorio de Noël, Bach's Cantata BWV 48, and of course the Mozart Requiem... and even without getting to the gorgeous Lacrimosa, I couldn't help but feel buoyed by the whole experience. I suppose I should point out some of the main differences I noticed from Chamber Singers... For one, the choir is bigger. I'd estimate about 80 singers, two-thirds of which are women, naturally. Still, the men held their own. The Bass section definitely benefits from the inclusion of some older members. And did I mention that I'm suddenly a Sop? (Okay, after two years of Carolyn, my voice teacher, constantly telling me not to be afraid to use my high range... I guess I should have seen it coming!) Still, two hours was more than a little strenuous.

Warm-ups were unfortunately short, and I don't think I quite understood the explanations in German, so I wasn't exactly able to make the most of it. Maybe I need to take a few minutes beforehand to make sure I'm ready... although I'll be coming straight from class, so we'll see how that works!

As far as sight-singing is concerned, between sitting in sections and being directed from the piano I totally have it made. So maybe this year I won't make any more progress with my fear of reading... but at least I'll learn the music quickly! With only one rehearsal a week I'm pretty sure the group always performs with score in hand, so that's easier too... although I'm sure the group sensitivity to direction will be nowhere near what we accomplished in CS, even pre-tour.

Speaking of sitting in sections... we learned parts sitting. Trying to hit the high notes, I found that even more strenuous than standing. (Maybe I'd feel differently if we'd stood for two straight hours...) I'm not sure if the arrangement is just for now or if it will always be this way. I like sections at the beginning, but if we never mix I think I'll find it a little frustrating. Even yesterday I noticed that the other parts were miles away and I couldn't really enjoy the interplay between the lines. Plus I couldn't hear myself at all in a sea of soprano... unless I fell into old habits and let some vibrato through, and then I stuck out like a sore thumb. Gonna have to watch that...

Still, I'm looking forward to next week's rehearsal. It's wonderful to have music again!

Okay, time for a quick lunch and then my first Neuro lecture!

It's a Beautiful Day

Yay for going to church!

I've been feeling so humongously stressed lately (see recent posts... almost every single one involves a ginormous venting session.) Sometimes I feel a little better when I focus on tiny details and shut out everything else, like lab stuff, language, or my writing style... but that's a temporary fix, at best. And when the details don't go exactly right, I've got nowhere to turn.

So it hit me yesterday that my approach has been all wrong. Being self-centered and anal only breeds discontent. Even if it's not the most comfortable thing in the world when everything around me feels foreign and "other," I have to make an effort to see the bigger picture.

Today's gospel reading was Jesus' elucidation of the most important rules: devote yourself entirely to God, and love your neighbor as yourself. Simple, yet infinitely challenging. The first is at the heart of every believer's personal struggle, and is always worthy of consideration. The second, though, was the one that struck me today. I've never felt that I was a particularly closed-minded person, but constantly feeling like an outsider in a new place has me on my guard. But why am I afraid? Nothing seriously bad has happened to me here, and even things that could go horribly wrong have turned out okay.

I need to re-learn how to put my trust in the right place... and let it rest there. Being detail-oriented may be a huge benefit in the lab, but in real life it's only a distraction. So what if I don't know all the answers? So what if culture and language are a little different and life feels unfamiliar? I'm at home, because I have my God.

I still have to struggle with Heimweh, especially for the people I care about. But this is something I've dealt with before, both in St. Louis and in Ohio. Plus I have Christmas to look forward to...

So I'll carry on. And hopefully, I won't lose sight of the big picture.

A dollar short...

Maybe I'm completely spoiled, but I've spent the morning channelling Warren Zevon.

Poor, poor pitiful me...

Yes, having a key to the Psych building all last year was a special indulgence. I don't expect 24-hour access here. But what kind of academic institution locks the buildings up on during daylight hours when school is in session?? Even on a Saturday, folks need to get stuff done. Especially me, because I'm forgetful and didn't think to go check out my test results at the Lektorat when they were posted Friday.

It doesn't help that it's raining today. On a positive note, I think I finally found the building where the Monday Biology lecture is held. I couldn't get in to locate the actual hall, but at least I'm on the right track.

Then I rode down to the old Klinik environs, which happen to house the Lektorat. The door was locked there too, but there were lights on inside and through the window I could just make out what looked like a list of names on the bulletin board. There was also a doorbell. Wonderful!

Except not. The lady that opened the door was not particularly thrilled to see me, even in my sunny yellow rain slicker. I got as far as "Entschuldigung, gibt es eine Liste.." before she cut me off and informed me that the building was locked and I'd have to come back Monday. Right, Monday, the day the classes start. I have the whole Lektorat course of study in my backpack, but it does me absolutely no good if I don't know which ones I'm eligible for. Plus, that morning from 8 to 11 I'm attempting to get into two other regular lecture classes a week late, and I'm in the lab that afternoon. Piece of cake, Monday.

I managed to stammer out that I understood before she shut the door in my face. Didn't have the wherewithal, not to mention linguistic capacity, to plead my case. It started raining harder. Sigh.

Someone, somewhere, does not want me to be a student this semester.

Fix and more

Eugh, sorry about the ugly whatever-the-heck line break code in the last post! I think it was a leftover from composing in Word, transfering to another computer with an older version of Word, and copy-pasting into Blogger through Firefox instead of my usual trusty Internet Explorer. I'm not sure which step is the actual culprit, but I'll be on my guard next time.

Anyway, it's all better now and has also jogged my memory a little. Yesterday I was ranting a little bit about writing conventions. The italics problem isn't fully solved, but I've decided to rely a little more on SHOUTING and boldface text, at least where emotional emphasis is concerned. (And I still fully believe that multiple exclamation points are a sure sign of a diseased mind!!!!)

As for indicating internal monologue and language shifts, I'm toying with the idea of cutesy HTML tags. Sure, I'm a total poseur and actually know very little about HTML. Not to mention the fact that I've only seen one person pull them off successfully, and then only in the context of an IM or away message. But it gets the gist across quickly and is less distracting than section breaks. So maybe from now on < Deutsch>Hi, my name is Alaina< /Deutsch> means "Hallo, ich heiße Alaina" in the real world. Maybe just the letter D instead of the whole word? Eh, worth a try.

Anybody who actually knows HTML... if I have to add a space anyway to make the code show up, could it still possibly screw with anyone's ability read the blog? If I'm attempting to clarify things, that would be a shame.

Obviously I don't have nearly enough to do to fill my time. Maybe I should take some classes or something.

Musings of the day

I’ve decided that in the German University system, students are viewed as an unfortunate side effect of the academic process.

This may also be true in the US, but at least there we are also a major source of revenue.

In Germany, however, many institutions of higher education charge no tuition. True, in most places there is a nominal fee per semester (in Göttingen I have to pay €93 plus some odd change) and many schools are considering going over to a tuition-based system (albeit for much less money than, say, Kenyon College.) But that hasn’t happened yet, and as a rule, students here can get a valuable education very cheaply.

There are trade-offs, however. My recent struggles with obtaining a student ID are a case in point. Offices are understaffed and, by and large, overworked. Every single semester, 25,000 people have to use one of four picture-taking terminals and stand in one line to receive a new, updated ID card. (That’s right, I have to go through this process again next semester.)

Maybe that’s a big school/little school thing, too. And yet, something tells me there’s more to it.

A personal academic advisor is a foreign concept. No wonder it sometimes takes people 6 or 7 years to get through undergrad.

And then there’s signing up for classes. Yes, I finally found a couple that seem interesting. And yes, I missed the first week’s worth due to minor preoccupations like getting my life in order.

On one side of the coin, that’s not really a problem. To register for a class, you just go. If you pass the final exam, the professor hands you what is basically a receipt and when you have enough of the right ones for a particular course of study you can graduate. A prof can kick you out for bad attendance, but with lectures of 100-200 people you’re unlikely to get caught skipping a few times.

On the other side, you’d think it would be hard to hide a gigantic lecture hall in a city of this size. And you’d be wrong. My potential “Allgemeine Entwicklungs- und Zellbiologie” course (that’s general developmental and cell bio) is held twice a week. So far after a few hours with a map, an address, my bike, and a heart full of hope, I’ve only managed to find one of the two lecture halls in which it is held. Wednesday morning in the back corner of the geology building, no problem… but as for Monday? I think I found the right street, but I might just have to pray that I’ll get shuffled into the right hall with the flow of traffic. Whatever happened to labeling buildings? Floor plans? Actually useful online maps?

The other course I’m interested in is Neurosciences Vorlesung (neuro lecture) which is held in English through the international graduate program. An intro level grad course? In my native tongue, no less? Sounds just about right! Today I woke up early and tried to get into the class. For this one I had it all planned out: scoped the locale the day before, and everything. What could go wrong?

So I showed up, all excited to finally get my stuff in order and have my very first graduate level class… and the hall is empty. Another student, a psych major from Kassel, was there for the same reason. The building secretary (luckily, the Max Planck Institute for Experimental Medicine building has a secretary!) was as mystified as we were. It’s a team-taught course, so she called one of the lecturers on behalf of the other student. (At this point, I’m just observing, since I’m even more scared of talking on the phone in German than I am of talking in German generally.) Apparently it caps out at 20 people and the course is already closed.

Bis schade. Dejectedly, I make my way to the lab and tell Hermann the story. He’s mystified too… apparently he taught a corollary tutorial for this very course last year, and it’s never been capped before. He advised me to check the seminar room back at the MPI building in case it’s going on there, and indicated that my case might be more viable since I’m only here for a year, I’m technically a bio major, and for gosh sakes I have a Fulbright.

So back, said hi to the secretary, got mildly lost again looking for the (of course empty) seminar room… and at this point I tell myself, eh, screw it, let’s talk on the phone in German.

Back to helpful secretary, and I ask if she’ll call for me. Apparently I didn’t make it very clear who I wanted to call, and she got the idea that some other prof whom she didn’t know very well was involved in the course by dint of his hanging around. So she dialed him up and handed me the phone. I pled my case, apologized for the language errors, and asked what to do next. He was very nice. No, your German isn’t that bad at all… but I’m not sure what I can do to help. I hand the phone back, confused, and try to explain that I wanted to call the other guy who apparently has somethig to do with the class. Didn’t quite come across, and the secretary informs the nice random guy on the phone that maybe we can try the exchange again in English. Sigh. Just to make sure, I ask again, in English, if he knows how I can get into the course. He has no idea, he’s just some biochemist.

So no go. But I was persistent. Please, could you call the professor the other girl spoke with? This time it worked, and soon I was yet again explaining myself auf Deutsch. The course is still technically closed… but since you’re an international student, and you have a grant… send me a short e-mail and I’ll see what I can do.

Woohoo! Profuse thanks, and I hung up the phone.

Umm… who is this guy, again? And where can I find his e-mail address?

Actually I’m starting to get the hang of the Uni website, and I think I looked the right guy up. Hopefully by next week I’ll know whether or not I can join the class… and maybe even where and when it actually meets!

I also find out tomorrow what level of Deutschkurs I get to take at the Lektorat. After poor Andrew’s story about getting busted all the way back down to Grundstufe (highest frickin’ functioning Grundstufe student I ever met!) I have my doubts. I suspect that the levels aren’t at all equivalent across different Bundeslände anyway, so at least that’s a consolation if the same happens to me.

*****

Can we talk about writing conventions for a minute?

(Yes, that’s rhetorical. I’m fully aware of the irony.)

It has come to my attention rereading some of the posts here that I’m running short on textual markers. Italics can mean, in a single post and sometimes in a single paragraph, any and all of the following: emphasis, inner monologue, quote, poem or song lyric, me speaking German, someone else speaking German. It makes sense to me when I write it, but I have no idea if the contextual backdrop provides significant clarification.

And don’t even get me started on inconsistent verb tenses in narrative. At this point, I’m resigned to the fact that I have a problem. I know it exists, but there’s little or nothing I can do about it.

Oh, and here’s another use for italic script dropping right into my lap… imagined responses from the peanut gallery.

Come now, you’re writing a blog here, not a novella. “Almost” being an English major at Kenyon College is no justification for petty whining over stylistic conventions. When your mother reads this she’ll think you’re being silly… or just weird.

Wow, the peanut gallery is getting personal today.

And yet I do think that there is potential value in an examination of style, even if it is just a blog. I spend enough time online to find stuff that’s really good. Lileks’ “Bleats” for example, are well written and enjoyable. He’s a professional, of course… But I don’t think it’s silly of me to want to emulate decent writing. If only to appease the tiny, curmudgeonly editor inside my head. It’s the least I can do… he has to go have a stiff drink every time I unwittingly switch verb tenses.

Good news!

Okay, so I almost had a cardiopulmonary episode today (story later) but as the title of the current post suggests, things are seriously looking up at the moment.

Starting with Saturday... the second day of the orientation for international students went well. The morning was spent on a scavenger hunt through Göttingen. Teams were organized to include members from different countries, with different languages, studying different subjects. My group comprised of a physics student from Colombia, a linguistics student from Italy, an economics grad student from Uzbekistan, a med student from Israel, two Hungarians (at the moment the subjects are escaping me) and of course myself.

I've gotta say, our team was a machine. Several of us had been in town for a few weeks or longer, which helped. I learned a few things about the city on the way, and managed to speak German consistently and contribute to the team. After I came up with an awesome team name ("die frische Frösche," or "the fresh frogs," intended as a pun on the American use of "frosh" as an abbreviation of "freshman") I was somehow voted the creative head of the group and given the job of designing and drawing our team picture. Well, I also had my snazzy cool new colored pens, so I guess I was the natural choice. We also had to write a skit, and although ours didn't turn out to be particularly original (should've seen that coming, all the groups had a handle on at least as many languages as group members!) we went second in the running order so it went over well.

Long story short, we kicked butt and won first place. Everybody got a coupon for a free movie ticket at the local art film house, and we made plans to get together Monday night for coffee and to enjoy our prize.

After the contest we learned about some of the extracurriculars and services available at the Uni. I might just get sucked into a semester of salsa lessons, even though it costs €40. Then we had dinner, and then we went to Roadhouse, a bar just north of the Stadtzentrum. It was loud and crowded and smoky, so I left early.

Sunday I woke up a little late and decided to blow off the last day's activities, since all that was on the schedule was an info session over course-of-study stuff that doesn't really apply to non-degreee-seeking students. (Blew of church too... oops, two in a row with last weekend's Berlin trip! Next weekend, I promise!) Instead, I went on a hike with my guest family (Wolfgang, Christina, her visiting brother Matthias and his Italian girlfriend Sylvia) to what's left of the castle Plesse, built by the bishop of Paderborn sometime before the year 1015. We climbed a smallish mountain and saw a spectacular view of the countryside from the top of the tower. Göttingen proper is in a valley and was hidden behind part of the mountain, but the surrounding villages to the north of the city were laid out in a splendid panorama.

Monday was also great. I spent the day in the lab and finally got internet access set up for my laptop, which I will be able to use for data analysis. Late afternoon I had my choir audition, in front of the director and four other people, I'm assuming other members of the choir. Mostly harmless, with only a couple of warm-up/range exercises. In confirmation of my deep dark suspicions, the director decided that I'm actually a soprano. Of course, I'll sing anything just to be able to sing, so it can't be too bad, right? And then I was supposed to sight read a few lines from Mozart's Requiem, which went about as well as could be expected... even four years of Chamber Singers didn't manage to rectify my total lack of confidence in my reading, but as soon as I get some kind of reassurance (someone singing the same part or plunking along on the piano) I'm off and running.

I was asked to leave the room for a few minutes, and then was called back in and offered a place in the choir, just like that. (Note to self: way less nerve-wracking than waiting for an e-mail from Doc or an a capella group!) They pointed out that I had added some vibrato on one of the range exercises, and asked me if I can do without it: another stylistic difference from CS. (Sure, anything, just let me sing!) I missed the first "rehearsal" (there are more auditions Wednesday so I'm not the only one) to meet up with my orientation team.

It was a fun evening. One member of the group had to miss and two others met us at the theater, but coffee and chitchat was fun. Conversation went political for a bit and everyone wanted my American perspective, which was a little uncomfortable but survivable. We saw an Italian film called Das Fenster Gegenüber, or La Finestra di Fronte, in Italian with German subtitles (whew!) I managed to follow the story and most of the dialogue, although I couldn't tell if the ending was intentionally open-ended or if I had missed something. The story is kind of a romance and kind of a mystery, centering around a woman, her neighbor, and an old man who has lost his memory. In the end it's not one of my ultimate favorites, but I wouldn't mind seeing it again. I think I'll have to watch all the movies I see this year again in English anyway just to see what's different!

Today was a day for getting things done. I finally got my student ID, and it only took another hour! Then I worked on getting a university internet account, which is necessary before I can get access in my dorm.

And here, at last, is where the story starts to get interesting. (Remember the aforementioned cardiopulmonary episode?) Afterwards I went to the dorm to see if I've gotten any mail there (no) and then back home to pay my €12 online for my internet account... only to find that my wallet was not in my purse. Or anywhere in the house, or in my bike basket. I knew that I had it when I signed up for my internet account, since I had to use my new student ID, but with all the biking I did today through the city it could be just about anywhere. Major panic attack. I went online to check my credit card balances, and momentarily freaked out even more... until I remembered that my parents charged my flights for Christmas on my visa for me. No other new charges, luckily. I knew that I only had about €50 in cash inside my wallet, but also two credit cards, two bank cards, a couple phone cards, €15 vodafone credit, my ISIC, and my new student ID!!!

I spent a little time running through the house checking fruitlessly through potted plants and under cushions while dreading the potential next step... luckily I have photocopies of all my stuff, so I could still use the phone cards to call and cancel my credit cards, and then tomorrow I could see what I have to do to get another student ID, a new bank card, and my life generally in order. Crap, I don't want to have to deal with all that stuff.

So in a last-ditch effort, I set out on foot to retrace my steps from this afternoon. I followed the same routes as I had taken on my bike, which took twice as long walking, but what if it had fallen out somewhere on the road? I had briefly visited my room in the dorm (to make sure it still existed?) and on the way back happy delusional fairies kept dancing through my mind, confabulating a memory of me putting my purse down, it falling over, my wallet slipping out... My mental soundtrack was stuck on "I've got the World on a String" for whatever reason, but it was hollow. (When I tried to turn it off I was left with "shitshitshitshitshit" on loop, though, so why not?)

The closer I got to Studentendorf, the harder I wished... and the less convinced I was that any good would come out of the whole trip. The tension kept building. Up the path... I could have snapped a pencil in half just by thinking about it. To the door... mentally able to kill single-celled organisms in a four-foot radius. Key in lock... small mammals in the vicinity run for their lives.

And of course it's not there. Why would I even think such a preposterous thing were possible?

So, by now most of the offices I visited today are already closed. Do I go home, place the dreaded calls, and spend a night tossing and turning and who knows how long putting my life back together? I still have my passport, thank God. Or should I keep following my trail, on the off chance that it jumps out at me from the bushes?

I decided to at least complete the job. On the way I passed the Italian girl from my orientation team. Exchanged pleasantries, described my plight, recieved her well wishes and advice... I should report it to the police. Oh yes, I forgot about that, the process is even more complicated than I had feared. Doggedly, the search continued. Not surprisingly, there was no miracle to be had on the sidewalk.

By the time I reached the zentralmensa-studentenwerk-giant monolith of a building (which I spent all morning and all afternoon all over) I was totally ready to pack it in and cut my losses. But... let's just see, shall we? Scanned the bench and floor by the stamp machine/mailbox where I had stopped to read something or other, checked out the computer terminals by the office where I got my internet account, which of course was closed... and then I saw a glove, and a small purse, and another. In a window. That's it! There's an information booth thing. With a lost and found. Is there any chance?

Aside from the fact that I forgot how to say "wallet" in German (note to self: die Brieftasche) I managed to make myself understood to the man behind the glass. He had me repeat my name a couple of times. The pronunciation always throws people for a loop, even moreso here than at home. Then, my heart skipped a beat. He told me it sounded familiar. Called to the woman in the back of the office... she asked a few questions, do you know where you lost it, when, etc. Some guy (a student?) found it and dropped it off this afternoon. Said it was outside of a lecture hall. He also left his phone number. Sign here...

And then all was right with the world. I checked... everything was there, even the cash. I walked home (sittin' on a rainbow, got a string...) looked up Brieftasche, called the number and left a message in very bad but very grateful Deutsch. I hope at least the message comes across!

So, I still don't know how I managed to lose it in the first place, but no harm done except to my poor frazzled nerves.

Tomorrow I get to take my placement test for German classes. Still haven't signed up for any "real" classes, and after this week I think the sign-up period is officially over. Part of me thinks I'm shirking my duties, and after today part of me really doesn't care. I guess by Friday we'll know which part wins.

Self-explanatory

Hmm... Yesterday... Interesting how angst and general emotional malaise coincide so perfectly with onset of menstruation. Just noticing, is all.

As for today... Went back to the international students office to figure out what is up with my ID card... the woman there told me she had been sick (which I knew) and that even though the money has been gone from my account for a week, she hasn't been able to check for herself that the University recieved it and tell the computer system that I can have my card. Fine. Then she said that she'd get around to it this afternoon.

Me (in German): So, if I go back to the other office this afternoon and try again, it will work, right?

Her (in German): Exactly. I have office hours until 1pm, but after that I'll take care of it.

So, come 1:15, I figure I'm a little early, but our campus tour has brought us to the appropriate office, and I get in line for the... seventh time?

And... No go. Must be too early.

When attempt number eight rolls around at 2:45 (after another half hour in line, naturally) with the exact same result, I'm really starting to get cheesed off with bureacracy. I can still use the picture-taking kiosk this weekend and print out the required form (plus another form to prove I'm finally registered with the University) but now I can't actually get my ID until Monday, and the other 2 or 3 offices that require a copy of said second form must wait likewise. And that's only if the thing finally works.

Otherwise, today was pretty decent. I found out that I don't actually need my ID to register for classes, so now I just need to spend some more time online this weekend to figure out which one(s) I want, and when and where I have to be for the first day to secure a place. My group for the orientation seems nice. They split the 50-odd of us up into smaller sections, and mine seems to be mostly scientists, and also mostly Spanish. We had a midday break and a bunch of us had coffee together, and although they kept reverting to spanish when the german wasn't coming and I got a little lost, it was fun.

Afterwards I went to the movies. Completely tangential note: they sell beer here in movie theatres. And in the dining halls.

And was für ein Film, you ask?

Why, Jungfrau, (40) mannlich, sucht...

Of course!

I figured The 40-Year-Old Virgin was a good place to start when it comes to seeing American films auf Deutsch: not too intelligent with lots of physical comedy. Plus, Steve Carrell! Of course now I have to see it in English, purely for comparison's sake. (Steve Carrell!)

I did miss a couple of jokes, but for the most part it came across really well. I also noticed that a couple of things that I found hilarious ("ja, der Freshmaker!") seemed to be a little lost on the rest of the audience. The dubbing was well matched and most of the time I didn't notice... although I've realized that sometimes my listening comprehension is a bit better when I can lipread a little, especially when people talk very fast. Of course the scene over the credits retained the original sound, which was glorious. Highly recommended.

I think my next adventure will have to be Wallace & Gromit auf der Jagt nach dem Riesenkaninchen. Oh, yes.

Tomorrow I have more orientation, and then some kind of group outing to a local bar at night. Should be fun!

Roller coaster

*****CAUTION: HORMONAL RANT TO FOLLOW*****THIS IS YOUR OFFICIAL WARNING*****TURN BACK NOW OR DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU*****

I’ve never had to make a conscious effort to be patient with myself before. Clarification: When I get really stressed, like basically all of last year, of course I have to take time to remind myself that I’m doing the best that I can, and that freaking out over little things that don’t go right… or sometimes big things that go dreadfully awry… is not a good use of my time.

But that’s a different category entirely from my current situation. Normally, I set standards high for myself. It’s just my modus operandi; it’s baseline. I like being the center of attention, especially if I’m being recognized for doing something especially well. That happens often enough for me that I almost need it. If I haven’t had a “fix” of recognition in a while, it’s time to spread myself even thinner and take on something new that can bring me the praise I desire, or redouble my efforts in an arena in which I’ve already established myself. Healthy or not, it’s how I work.

Now, it’s a good afternoon if I manage to speak spontaneously more than once or twice… and understand and answer questions on the first or second try. The little mistakes (sitting on my bike in front of the crosswalk looking at the wrong red light while a disgruntled motorist waits for me to go) have more of a chance to build up into the proverbial tiny storm cloud that follows me around. And once it starts building, I’m even more scared to make a mistake and I totally clam up.

Can any of my friends or family even imagine me being quiet for a whole day? Bottling it all inside? I thought not. I process things verbally. I have my quiet moments, but if I go too long without some back-and-forth… or even some monologing… then something is wrong.

Ha, welcome to my monologue!

Anyway, maybe I’ve painted too dark a picture. My friends also know that I’m generally a happy person, and that I tend to keep an even keel. I’m prone to overstressing myself, but usually not gross overreaction. If I’m addicted to positive reinforcement, I can also satisfy that craving in simple ways. A good conversation, a walk or a bike ride, singing any old song, playing dress-up (yes I still do!), dancing, meditation, reading… the list goes on and on.

Maybe the hardest part about being here is that my established patterns of self-reassurance are distinctly lacking. New language, new town, new church, new choir (hopefully), new friends (hopefully… oh how I miss Kiel!)… the list goes on and on. I remember feeling some of this disjointedness when I first got to Kenyon, but time has blunted the memory. Plus there was no language barrier, cultural distinctions were barely relevant, and I was fulfilling my assigned role in life as a confused first-semester freshman.

Well, now I’m a big bad alum. And so what? There is no safety in that status. I’m supposed to be self-sufficient now. I can’t hide behind a category any more.

This is where making a conscious effort to be patient with myself comes in. Okay, people on the street are unlikely to give me the benefit of the doubt when I make a rookie mistake, because until I open my mouth I look like a native, and I look old enough to know better.

I do know better. I know that I’m still adjusting, and that as long as I’m trying my best I have nothing to be ashamed of. I know that it’s okay to be frustrated, as long as I keep it in perspective and refuse to let the little details dominate my life.

The problem is that right now it feels like a constant struggle to remind myself of these points. It’s wearing on me… but when I let myself fall into bad mental habits, I feel crappy. So that’s no good either.

Okay, an exercise. What have I done recently that was good? My Western went well. I’m officially a resident of Göttingen, at long last, and I managed to handle the Rathaus all by myself. I think I have a grip on all the remaining deadlines for Fulbright: feedback on the language course, registering for the meeting in March, etc. My reapplication to Northwestern is almost done, and by Monday I think I’ll be ready to submit it. I’m coming home for Christmas, and those plans are almost pinned down. I signed up for the language placement test. Choir auditions are Wednesday (exciting and only a little nerve-wracking.) I signed up for the international student orientation events this weekend, which can’t hurt. I bought really cool markers so I can color-code my lab book.

That’s a nice list.

Is it long enough to outweigh the fact that I still don’t have a student ID and classes supposedly start Monday? Maybe it is. First of all, I’ve been working on this since day one, so it can’t be a problem on my end. The only person at the international students office who is able to help me has been sick, and hopefully it will finally be rectified tomorrow. And Fulbright doesn’t care if I take classes or not, so no extra pressure. Plus after this weekend’s orientation I’ll be… better oriented, right?

Maybe there are difficult moments, but I'm up to the challenge, right?

Sigh. I keep telling myself.

Discoveries

Saw the results of my first gels today, and was told that I have a natural talent. I suspect that good teachers and patience honed in biopsychology labs (motto: if the rats didn't have a mind of their own, we wouldn't be studying them) more than accounts for the success. Luckily, all my rookie mistakes were decently benign. I am not stained silver, Gott sei Dank. Okay, next time I won't drop the membrane on the floor... but apparently the five-second rule totally applies in biology.

In other news, look what I found today! Just goes to show you that sometimes, when you're searching for something at a German website of a German school, you should use the English word. No idea why this is the case, but hey, auditions are next Monday already! Just in the nick of time! Rehearsals are only once a week, but that's once a week more than I'm getting right now.

Also, if you know any German at all, enjoy the writings of Mark Twain, and haven't read his treatise on the tongue yet, then you haven't lived. I read lots of Twain when I was a kid, but can't remember having come across this little gem before. I definitely have to start using "haben sind gewesen gehabt haben geworden sein" in conversation whenever possible.

Random thought: What if O. Henry had been a German? Or Faulkner? *involuntary shudder*

On the other hand, I could definitely read Hemingway auf Deutsch.

Total stream of consciousness... other amusing thing of the day: click here.

*****

Back to reality! I had a surprise trip to Berlin this weekend. Host-brother Martin is in the process of setting up his new apartment in Prenzlauer Berg. It's reassuring to me that young people all over the world require more than one car-load to get all their crap from one place to the next... Christina and Wolfgang and I tagged along for the second mini-bus load and to drive the bus (a 4 hour trip) back to Göttingen. The first day in Berlin I saw Ikea and Martin's new apartment, especially the stairwell as we unloaded all his stuff. We went out to dinner at a local Greek restaurant with lots of "frescoes" on the wall that literally looked like poster shots from some bad 1960's movie about ancient Greece... or cover art from equally bad historical romance novels.

Sunday was better. Christina and I ditched the work and took the train to downtown Berlin. I saw the Brandenburger Tor (from both sides,) the train station, and the Regierungsviertel... the day before Merkel's chancellorship was officially announced. I saw only one press van camped outside the Bundestag building Sunday afternoon, but the place must have been a zoo Monday night. I'll see more of the city at Thanksgiving, and hopefully bring my bike this time!

Better go eat something before Mike calls! (Yay!)

Some progress

Today I poured my first gel ever, and ran a standard. The dye is setting right now and Monday I'll have something pretty to look at. It's so neat to finally put a "face" to the stuff I learned about in bio.

My advisors continue to be really cool. "Hermann the German" is actually Dr. Esselmann, but I think he'll stay HtG in my mind. Like HmcF, my Kenyon advisor, he has a good handle on when to be hands-on and explanatory and when to encourage me to fly solo. I tend to be excited to learn new methods but highly unsure of myself at first, so it helps quite a bit.

In gegenteil, I still don't have my University ID or any means to register for classes, and time is marching on.

***** Begin Stokesesque-rant (adjectival form, now!)*****

Ah, for the days at Kenyon, where the most incomprehensibly bureacratic thing you could possibly face was, let's say, getting an organization funded... but the entire staff of the SAC was always ready to jump in with explanations and a friendly smile, and if by second semester freshman year you hadn't started learning the ropes, you were obviously an unengaged hermit, or possibly a student-shaped rock.

There's this little office called the Registrar, where you can make all your dreams come true in 20 minutes or less. UCCs... even the bad ones teach you something, and anything else you need to know just involves asking someone. Anyone.

Why oh why can't the rest of the world just work the same way?

*****End Stokesesque-rant*****

Maybe it just seems less comprehensible because it's all in another language, but I'm convinced that a large chunk of my difficulty is post-Gambier culture shock. Class of '05, are you with me? Without a doubt. Still, I wouldn't have done anything different.

And maybe the rest of the world does work the same way, but I've been too afraid to ask for help. Kenyon's strength is that it taught me to depend on those around me for support... but always within the context of a small, familiar community, which is a weakness I didn't really see until now. Now that I understand it, though, I have a chance to correct it.

Learning curve

So I got a more detailed intro to the lab today... somehow in a couple of short years I've managed to go from rat gynecologist to chicken vampire. At least one component of my study will involve taking blood and tissue samples from chicken embryos... with a glass pipette and suction provided the old-fashioned way. Slurp. Not something you want to do too quickly.

But I do get to learn to pull my own pipette tips. At long last!

I've been kicking myself for the past couple of days for missing out on bio methods classes at Kenyon... I had the opportunity to take both Cell and Neurobio methods courses with Dr. Itagaki, and darn it if I didn't miss an awesome chance there. For starters, I'd be at least passably familiar with all this stuff, rather than requiring a month to play catch-up.

On the other hand, I have a whole year here and the chance to really focus on my lab work, so maybe this isn't too bad. I'll pick stuff up quickly enough. Plus, if I had thrown intro bio lab onto my coursload freshman year I think I would have dropped out of school... or missed out on other really good classes. C'est la vie. (Wait... that's totally not german... Ordnung muss sein??)

So now I get to learn everything I ever wanted to know about amyloid-beta processing (already have 5 or 6 awesome articles to read) and really nifty modern ways to study it, and it's totally my life this year. No applications, interviews, and million other things to gum up the works! How cool is that?

In conclusion, science is awesome. Das stimmt.

*****

On the other side of things... Do I need to take classes? I haven't pinned any of that down yet. I went to the international students office this morning (it's only open between 9 and 1) to try and get my student ID and the info to register... and it turns out I needed another form from the other side of town before we could proceed. So, biked around, got mildly lost, went a few blocks out of the way... only to learn that the office will only deal with my request between 9 and 11 am. It's just past 12 at this point, so no go. Tomorrow. Plus I need to get my dorm situation finally situated. That office is in another direction and is only open between 9 and 12... then hopefully back to the international students office before it closes. Sigh. Tomorrow morning is going to be busy.

I feel the need to keep up formal studies, if just a german class and some relevant bio course. Is that so wrong? We'll see how many offices I have to find tomorrow.

Now to go on a quest for a bike helmet and basket, not to mention a locksmith to see about this lock. Wish me luck!

A million miles

I feel like I’ve traveled so far in the past week… Even though the longest distance I’ve covered in this adventure was just under two months ago, this leg feels somehow more significant. I’m pretty experienced with transitions at this stage of my life. From my comfortable cradle at Kenyon to my (in some ways even less demanding) life at home with family and great job… to a new country, new friends, new school, but still with the distinct sensation that things were being taken care of for me. A caveat… it’s not that someone is holding my hand every step of the way. But at the same time, with orientation meetings, the full staff of the Lektorat in Kiel at my disposal, and a fast-established network of friends, I only rarely felt the pressures of my newfound independence.

Now things are a little different. My host family has smoothed things immensely. Getting picked up from the train station, the ability to send luggage and important mail ahead to a real address, having a place to sleep the first few nights and good food to eat, help finding my bike, exploring the city with the guidance of knowledgeable residents, not to mention intangibles such as learning culture bit by bit simply through daily interaction… without these wonderful gifts I think I’d feel totally adrift and possibly would have had a breakdown by now. And yet, it’s become fully apparent to me that this is the critical stage in my own development, meine private Weiterentwicklung. And it's scary.

Is it sink or swim? In some ways, the pressure is low. Fulbright cares that I generally make good use of my time here, but if my project sinks or I drop… or fail… all my classes the only consequences are self-enforced. Ah, therein lies the rub. Perfectionism is my favorite pathology.

From whence spout these feelings of self-doubt, though? Luckily, I’m not particularly given to existential angst. Still, there are a lot of unknowns, and enough near-misses (e.g. the train on the way here) to unsettle me a little. Things that should be helping, my host family, church yesterday, are rather failing to set everything right. It’s a strain to try and fit in with a new family and be a good guest, especially when it requires all your daily concentration to follow the small-talk. St. Vinzenz is nice enough, but unfortunately modern and cramped compared to St. Heinrich’s in Kiel, with its high arched ceiling and bright windows… The music is a little more singable, but I still don’t know the songs. By week six in Kiel the congregation was studded with familiar faces, including one of my classmates and one of the teachers from the Lektorat.

Eh, these things take time.

I had a good bike trip with Wolfgang through the town yesterday. I don’t have my bearings quite yet, but places are starting to look familiar. Kiel was bigger, but more spread-out. The stadtzentrum in Göttingen is so jam-packed with shops and streets that I can barely process it. Also, Kiel had a big water landmark, the fjord. In St. Louis I tend to know where I am and where I’m going if I know where the river is, and I adopted the fjord very easily for the same purpose. There are a couple of main streets here that will be useful, but streets are deceptive. They change names on you, for starters. I’ll have to spend more time with the map.

The trip yesterday was also a bit disarming due to the fact that I could barely keep up with my host-dad. Okay, he’s not old and decrepit or anything… but it’s been a while since I’ve been on a bike, and I think he picked the hilliest path in town, along the route of the old city wall. I’m accustomed to a crappy bike that is too small for me and refuses to shift gears unless we’re on a total flat straightaway and I give at least two business day’s advanced notice in the form of a notarized brief, on letterhead, in triplicate, preferably signed in blood. Thus, given a bike that actually works, I'm at rather a loss about how to proceed. Technically, I should raise Flora’s seat a little for complete peddling comfort… but then I’d have to walk everywhere because there’s no way I could get on, let alone get started. Even now I’m pretty wobbly. So for now, I’m “Stokesing it” (with all due apologies to BSII) and a very real threat to myself and innocent bystanders. Next on agenda: purchase helmet, grow some leg muscles.

Super exciting and super scary… I met Dr. Hüther today and got a brief tour of the lab/clinic and environs. I have my own desk space! There are lots of cool scientific machines that make cool scientific noises and do cool scientific things! It was very general. I saw most of the wing of the building I’ll be working in, including the locked door to the psychiatric ward, which is attached. (Apparently sometimes you might “hear things” from over there, but the staff usually has things under control. Ahem.) I met a colleague who will be my direct supervisor for my project. He introduced himself as "Herman the German," and at the moment I forget his last name... Oh, my project! Get ready for this… no rats for me this time. It’s omlettes from now on. That’s right, I’m studying protein expression in chicken embryos. The model is really good for developmental studies of the proteins relevant in dementia pathology, because they are completely identical to their counterparts in the human nervous system. And just as tasty.

After the introduction Dr. H and I went into the city for coffee (or in my case hot cocoa) and ice cream. (I could get used to an advisor who buys me ice cream…) I went into the day staunchly resolved to speak only German, but the topics quickly eclipsed my miniscule vocabulary, so I resorted to a sort of half-and-half. Disappointing, but still a good conversation. Dr. H studied biology in east Germany, but hopped the wall to come to Göttingen and help found the research institute here. Now he spends lots of time writing, and he gave me a copy of his first book, Biologie der Angst: Wie aus Streß Gefühle werden. Ironically relevant to my current situation. I had planned to start a novel this week to help my language, but I think I’ll begin with this one. It’s sort of a general guide to today’s understanding of neuronal plasticity of networks and pathways, especially in terms to experiential learning, and how we can use our understanding of these systems to tame our emotions and make life a little better.

We’re meeting again tomorrow morning to go through the nitty-gritty details, and hopefully soon I’ll get underway… but I’ve got a lot to learn. I’ve done HPLC work and protein chromatography, but I’ve got to learn PCR and a whole host of other methods in a short time. And find some useful classes… and get this dorm room thing settled so I have a place to live at the end of the month. Yikes.

Ah, the unknown and unforeseeable future. When will I learn to embrace it for all the potential beauties it holds?

Maybe tomorrow. Maybe tonight after I talk to Mike. Maybe after I read this book…

Settling in again...

Both my suitcases have arrived, as well as the box of winter clothes and shoes from home. Today I finished my unpacking (and re-packing some stuff for storage until I move to the dorm) and decorated a little with pictures from home, my giant map and my Fulbright scarf on the wall. Looks like everything fits! I had the house to myself this morning, which was nice... but as of yet I don't have a key, so if there is nobody around to let me back in I'm kind of stuck. Hopefully I'll get a key and a little more freedom next week.

I did get a city tour yesterday. Christina drove us down to the Stadtzentrum and we walked around for a couple of hours and ran a few errands. I saw all the important stuff… popular meeting points, good cafés, University landmarks, the main Mensa, and of course the best place to get ice cream. We also went to one of the city churches, St. Jacobi, and explored the bell tower. Heights still give me the flying heebie-jeebies from time to time, but I survived. Photo montage to be posted at a later date. I was too scared for my life to take pictures on the way up, but I got some good ones on the way down. A stone spiral staircase led to the space above the ceiling. Wooden stairs to the workings of the clock, which gave way to steep ladder-stair constructions to the four or five upper levels. We stopped at the second-highest. Maybe sometime I'll be brave enough to go all the way...

Göttingen’s smaller than Kiel and very navigable, although I only have the vaguest sense of how downtown fits together. That’ll take a few more trips! I also need to buy a sturdy map. I spent time yesterday looking at the 30-year-old Stadtplan that Christina found around the house, but I don’t think it would survive a year in my purse. The upshot… everything I need is on the north side of town, which is highly convenient since I put no planning into it whatsoever.

I also met Oma yesterday, Christina’s mom, who lives in an Altenheim in Göttingen since last year when Christina’s dad passed away. She’s still up and about and from what I gathered comes over regularly, which is great. She needs help with a few things, so Christina does her laundry and helps her wash and do her hair. Her home is huge… it looks more like a hotel than a nursing home, and she’s got a kitchenette and a big single room. Germany’s population is very unbalanced at the moment. The largest portion comes from Oma’s generation, and the birth rate is low so some schools are actually closing from lack of students. We talk quite a bit in the USA about the aging baby-boomers and what that entails in terms of society, the goals of medicine, policy, etc., and some of the public issues in Germany may be a taste of what’s in store… granted, it’s a very different system: health care is for the most part public and social benefits are very high, zum beispiel.

Well, today. Tomorrow is the delayed election in Dresden, and afterwards the political parties here will either have an important missing piece of the puzzle… or, more likely, a still muddier outlook on how to build a government and even less time in which to do it. Most of what I’ve heard in the media indicates a “wait and see” attitude on the part of the candidates, so a lot of weight has been put on the remaining votes. Both candidates are basically running a platform of reform since the German economy is pulling the rest of the EU down at the moment, but to differing extents. Things like the privatization of health care, the inflated welfare state and joblessness have been hot-button issues all along, so until things settle out of the current state of flux and the new government gets down to the issues at hand it’s hard to paint a picture of how the nation will deal with these strains. Depending on how things shake themselves out, the US stands to learn quite a bit from the examples here.

Back to Oma, though. She doesn’t really like her new home. It’s big and kind of impersonal and… just different. Understandable. I’d like to see more of the place, myself. Oma does ceramic work in her spare time, and they have a kiln, which is fabulous. She gave me a cute pair of little pigs she had made. Maybe they need volunteers…

Today’s goal was to look for a bicycle. Martin advised a trip back to the train station, since apparently a lot of bikes are hocked there. There are of course shops where one can get one new, but that was a last resort as I hoped to spend less than €100. (And of course I’ll get some back when I sell it off next summer. I perused the daily newspaper this morning and found a couple of ads for bicycle shop, but only one ad for a used bike, a little short on details. We called after Wolfgang came home, went for a look-see and ta-da I have a bike!

Again, picture later. It’s a little tall, but it’s a girls bike so the bar is low and I think I can get on the thing… getting started will be another matter, but I’ll get plenty of practice. It came with a lock but no key, so rectifying that and getting a basket and helmet are next on the to-do list. Aluminum with like-new tires, an air-pump (attaches to the bike), a water bottle holder, a bell, a light, a rear-view mirror, and 6 gears, which should be plenty since so far the main parts of town look pretty flat. The seat has a small rip and the paint on the bell is chipped a bit, but otherwise it’s perfect. And… €90. According to the little manual pamphlet it’s called the “Town & Country,” but I think I’ll call her Flora Fahrrad.

After lunch I left Flora behind and walked around. It's been raining all day, but with my new German rain jacket and umbrella (lost the other one on the train) I managed to stay dry. I found the closest Catholic church, about a 15 minute walk. Get this Kenyon folk... It's called St. Vinzenz. Full circle, no? Mass at 10am tomorrow. Then I and my trusty 30-year-old map got a little lost, but I think I managed to find my future dorm, the office I have to go to in order to get said dorm, and the general vicinity of my new lab. It's a little further than I initially thought, but totally doable with a bike. Lab tour Monday, registering with the Uni and signing my rent contract Tuesday. Progress!

The only drawback here so far is that I don’t have internet access on my computer, and the family machine is a little slow. Still, I think I’ll have daily e-mail access. Don’t look for me on Skype or IM in the next month or so, but I’m far from inaccessible. Bis später!